Warning:Children may increase alcohol consumption.......

This week began so fantastically, return home after working late to a pale faced co-parent. The dialouge went something like this. Me: How was your night love? M: You'd better sit down....... The children had returned to the nest after the Dad weekend, albeit in tatters.  No. 1 had a bruised eye, inflicted by No. 3 and No. 2 had gone into meltdown post the eye incident and called a friend who came to rescue her. Meanwhile Dad is obvilious to the dramas unfolding, for he was at work! Things must have calmed down considerably enough for No. 2 to return to Dads with her friend for protection. She then felt compelled to act on an instruction from No. 3 (who was the much calmer version than the object weilding one earlier) to give her a haircut. Now this may seem like a fairly reasonable thing to do on any given Sunday afternoon IF you are a HAIRDRESSER.  No. 3 has very wild coarse unmanageable hair that resembles a badly clipped hedge if the length creeps up, when cut by even the most qualified hair artist. Bravely the girls tackled a job that most hairdressers shudder at. I'd say at this stage ignorance would and must be bliss. 
By this time of the post work conversation, I was ready to push away the cup of earl grey in favour of a cold Sav blanc.
24 hours later have called an official family meeting
AGENDA ITEMS
1. Hair cut can be worn out in public for now
2.Phones confiscated
3.Family values and better choices lecture on continuous replay
4.Many remorseful tears
5.Moved from Sav blanc to Reisling
I am considering completing an intake to drug and alcohol for myself ahead of time........got a feeling I'm gonna need it........arrrrgghhhhhh!!!!!!